Dear World:
In every presidential election lately we hear of the need in this country to increase family values. My personal experience is often that the preachers are a big part of the decline.
Six years ago I married the most wonderful lady from the Philippines. A better wife, mother, and citizen no one could hope for. Her family members are very honest, sincere, and intelligent people. In my four lengthy visits to the Philippines I have never been treated better and with more respect by anyone in my life. I am extremely proud to have become a member of my Philippine family.
We have made some visits there, until a couple years ago, when, because of my job and the birth of our second son the trip was impossible. We decided that that year would be a great year to start to repay the tremendous hospitality back to the family and invite one member there to visit us as a tourist during the summer. In future years we could take turns with us visiting there and someone visiting here next. The Philippines has not seen the economic success that we are blessed with so we would be the ones to pay for the travel and subsistence while here. My sister-in-law Brenda has worked many years for the same computer company since high school to help the family pay college expenses for the other siblings and has never had a real vacation. We invited her to come.
I ordered and received all necessary paperwork from our United States Immigration Department to demonstrate that I was capable and would be financially responsible for her travel and total care while here. I included notarized copies of all additional data I thought may be needed by her to convince our INS in Manila that this was a real and sincere visit. When our sister was called to the embassy there for her interview she took days away from her job to fly to Manila early to be sure she was on schedule and properly prepared. The American gentleman who interviewed her and many others at the same time looked only at her application shaking his head and told her she could not visit her family unless her financial condition improved. He refused to look at or consider the paperwork that INS required of me to fill out here. The interview lasted maybe one minute- it is the American way.
In discussions with many since then I learned, to visit here from the Philippines, that family ties are of no value and that only money talks as a reason. My status is not considered, only the financial wealth of the visitor. It is the American way. I have traveled in many countries and the Philippines is the only place I have visited that really welcomes Americans with of without riches. Many have celebrated July 4th as American appreciation day. We have had no better ally or friend since hundreds of thousands died with our forces in the war with Japan. Since the refusal I have spoken to Philippine people, immigration attorneys, and many others who could have advised me as to what is really the reason for the abrupt and impolite turn down. I am assured that there is a no visitation policy in place for people from the Philippines unless you are very old and very wealthy. I have been advised and told she should have lied and not said that she has family in the USA because that amplifies the chance of rejection tremendously. It is the American way.
To quote some of the bigoted requirements that apply only to the Philippines, “Every alien shall be presumed to be immigrant until he establishes to the satisfaction of the officer, at the application for a visa that he is entitled to nonimmigrant status”. Or in simple English- you are considered a liar- it is the American way.
Further explanation is: “Essentially, the visa officer is looking to see that the applicant has a good reason for going to the United States, and an even better reason for returning abroad. By law, the burden of proof is up to the applicant to show that he or she qualifies for the visa. This proof may come in many forms, but when considered together, it must be enough for the interviewing officer to conclude together, that your overall circumstances, including social, family, economic and other ties to the Philippines, will compel you to leave the United States at the end of a temporary stay”- or in simple English- whatever this almighty visa officer decides is beyond any repute. It is the American way. I could go on forever with our government prejudices toward my family.
Some of the actual cases of turndown that I know of are: parents turned down to attend their child’s wedding here, grandparents to visit grandchildren they have never seen, and sisters to visit their nephew and godchild never seen (me). You name any reason to visit your family and you have found a reason to turn down Philippine visitation – it is the American way.
I spent two tours in SEA during the Vietnam War, don’t cheat on taxes, I don’t ever drive over the speed limit. Why, when I fill out required paperwork and pay fees, can’t they show the courtesy to at least look at the data? Why when I notarize letters that this is a family visit and not an attempt to sneak into this country and I assumed to be a liar?- it is the American way.
We are, like many others, faced with the two-part dilemma. My wife has been here long enough to be a citizen in this great? nation, but to do so she is basically giving up her family to only letters and phone calls or very expensive flights with small children. It doesn’t feel fair to ask that of her. My personal dilemma is my shame to be an American. When I visit the Philippines, the country and my family welcome me with love and generous acceptance. I am very proud to be a member of my family there. They require no preplanned visa or harsh proof of any kind. When my family there tries to visit by my invitation they are spit upon. How can I visit there and face them? It is the American way and I am ashamed to be part of it.
This letter is a plea from a very disillusioned man. I have written Congressmen, Senators, The President, the Vice President, Officials of the INS, the Ambassador in the Philippines, even the wives of the President and Vice President. To date I have no response except an automatic computer response. It is the American way.
I would just like to send my apology to the people of the Philippines and send the message that we-the citizens here are not the ugly Americans that they meet representing our government.
Sincerely,